Saturday, March 5, 2016

Still Clean in 2016

I have been engaged to my wonderful Fiance Denise since just after we met. Engaged since 7/31/2014.

Wednesday, January 23, 2013


(1 YEAR)

United States................................................................................................

United Kingdom...........................................................................................
South Korea

Monday, August 6, 2012

Yup, Still Clean Since October 2011

Just won $8500. gonna get my drivers license back.
Old court costs gonna go Bye-Bye.

Saturday, June 23, 2012

Still Clean and Doing Better Than EVER

Sunday, February 19, 2012 Weblog

Addiction Advice Here.

January 20, 2011

Introduction; Addiction Advice.

August 2, 2008
This blog is intended to help avoid problems with addiction and possibly work through addiction to a sober life.
It will begin with some life experiences and I will invite other successful recovering addicts to add their stories and input.
Again, this is not only for the addict but also
loved ones can find signs in people they care for of addiction
and hopefully resolve those issues before they escalate.

Thursday, January 26, 2012

Does Cocaine Make You Hallucinate?

Does Cocaine Make You Hallucinate?

As for me, yes.
Not like LSD or mushrooms though.
It's more like this, at least it was for me.
One example is when we used to smoke crack behind a building, on the edge of a field. In front of us were railroad cars stacked 2 high forming a wall around a whole city block of nothing but railroad cars or in other words the containers seen being hauled on 18 wheelers.
Anyway, to the right of us, about 150 yards away was a banana packing warehouse this was on the edge of an area known as Wynnwood which is just N. of Overtown a low income area for projects (section 8 housing).
On to the hallucinating, there's no one around, it's the middle if the day and I take a big ol' blast off my glass pipe.
POW! I look over at the banana warehouse and I swear I see a few guys dressed in all black & wearing black ski masks, like S.W.A.T. team members.
I always feel like someone is watching me and waiting for the moment I let my guard down to somehow overtake me or capture me, even though, just 2 minutes before, I felt strong as could be and told myself every thing was cool.

The messed up part is, that, it's always like this, for me anyway.
I've known plenty of people who don't get one bit paranoid.
Many just spend their "high" searching around for some crack they think they dropped and "never did".
A large number of crack smokers will take a hit and start looking out windows, I guess that's a paranoid reaction too.
Being around that type while getting high makes me even more paranoid.
More recently I would get high alone in my apartment.
Again, everything is cool at first but after the first hit I'll take another in a little while (usually about 20 Min.)
and start getting quite paranoid.
I always resort to staying away from the front door, usually near the kitchen, with a large steak knife at arms length.
Even when I lived in Houston, TX I lived on the second floor, I used to take hits and imagine those same S.W.A.T. characters dressed in black from head to toe coming down on ropes from the roof and breaking in to my bedroom window.
Luckily at that apartment I had a room mate that I used to play cards with and attempt to stay focused.
He would be one of those that's always picking around the floor looking for the all elusive "lost hit",
but he would only do that for a few minutes, I would tell him"C'mon man, it's your turn to play a card", and he would shake it off.
He helped me get back to reality too.
There were several times though, in the year or so that we rented there, that he would want to shut the lights off and peak under the door or out the window.
That reminds me of the times we had our manager over for a couple weeks. Our manager had broken up with his lady & came to sleep at our place.
He was pretty crazy when he ran out of money & drugs.
He ripped off our neighborhood Colombian dealer (who knew where we lived) and that he was staying with us. He stole a good handful of rocks and quickly began to smoke, smoke, smoke.
Next thing you know, he's turning out the lights and telling us he just ripped off the dealer.
I got the first thing I could get my hands on to protect myself, (a tennis racquet) and went toward the back of the apartment.
There was a knock at the door and we heard a bunch of rustling, so my manager does the right thing and goes up towords the front of our place.
He didn't open the door of coarse.
Next thing you know the window is broken and arms are reaching in the window.
our manager has a big kitchen knife and seams to be ready.
He starts hacking at the arms and they take off.
The next problem is that the police show up.
All our lights are still off and the cops are knocking and flashing their flash lights all over the broken window and trying to see inside.
I thought they would reach in and pull the drapes open, but they never did.
I was sitting on the couch all the while waiting to jump up and say something like "Hi, Oh, the window? ah, that was just a prank one of our friends pulled".

Now, back to the reactions people have to stupid ass crack.
By the way, I never liked the stuff, but it has a nagging quality that draws one back to it again and again.
It's SICK!
Then there are a small number who I have come across who feel like they have bugs crawling on them.
They keep scratching and picking, kind of like a Meth Head.
I only know a bit about Meth from what I have seen in the show "Cops"
And seeing picture of how they look like 10 years older after only being hooked for a year or two.
There is another type crack head I was going to tell you about, oh yeah.
These are usually guys who do this, and I have seen a few girls who do this too.
They take a hit and get really horny.
Some will start feeling their privates and basically be masturbating with their pants on around everyone else. We just smirk and ignore them as much as possible
Then there are some who will pull their pants down & masturbate "wide open".
This type I just dint smoke with ever again. Even if they are giving the stuff away.
I have even seen a guy, I guess he spent  time in prison or something, he was about 48 and when he took a big blast around my friend and I, he started asking if we wanted to Fuck him.
Crazy, we were out of there quick!

Also see;,,,,,,,,,

Thursday, January 12, 2012

"Marijuana" National Geographic Drugs Inc - Part-1

Also see;,,,,,,,,,

(Heroin) - National Geographic

Saturday, January 7, 2012

Addiction Advice on Word Press

See for some entertainment. My favorite music and video.

Friday, December 23, 2011

A New Phase Started Recently

 My wife recently lost her job where she has worked for just over four years as a seamstress at a dry cleaner.
To be honest, since I got out of jail last December 2010, Although I was on probation with occasional drug testing (urine), I have been using cocaine 1-4 times per week.
I wasn't using habitually like in the past, just spending $10.00 - $30.00 each of those days.
About a month ago I found someone who could get me ecstasy (or something that was a-lot like ecstasy.
I don't really like cocaine, my mind just tricks me into thinking it's something I want.
For me, it's too speedy, makes me too nervous and the only part I really enjoy only lasts for a few seconds (when smoking it).
Ecstasy is a whole other ball game.
I enjoy almost every minute of it, except near the end when it's wearing off, it feels like that part takes forever, stuck in between being high and being normal again.

Well, I want to get back to my wife being out of work.
Her being home all the time or the possibility of her coming home any time
(which is where I always use cocaine) deterred me from using cocaine quite a bit.
When I got the X (ecstasy) a few weeks ago, that made me remember just how much I prefer using X and that coke is a waste of time and money.
I still think about using coke a-lot, but seem too have more control over my mind & impulse to go and get some.
My wife connected with some designers in her field of work who want her to work at home putting together their clothing & other articles, so that (thank God) is another deterrent which is helping me stay away from wasting my time & money on coke.
That and the fact that our income has been greatly effected since she was between jobs.

As for myself, I have held down the same job since March 2011 after I got out of jail (5.5 months)
My job doesn't give us (the employees) very many hours though, which is another reason I had a-lot of extra time to fool around and use drugs.
Fortunately about the same day I met my connection for X, I had someone respond to an ad I had in where I had offered my services to hand out flyers (propaganda) for a business.
My idea was to get 2-3 business to let me do that, for only a few hours a day and earn from each one of them for working the same hours essentially making about $21.00 per hour for a few hours a day.
I love being an entrepreneur and selling.

So, what it all boils down to is that, due to certain circumstances that came to be in my life, I have been able to attain my goal these past few weeks, which is to stop using coke.
I never even liked the stuff, even though I have used it on and off for about 22 years.
It's just that coke has a strange way of staying on ones mind and one has to really make an extra effort to stay away from it.

See for some entertainment. My favorite music and video.